Tuesday, April 20Urban Hippie

Author: Tim Marcin

We made up punny names for New Jersey marijuana dispensaries to cope with election anxiety

We made up punny names for New Jersey marijuana dispensaries to cope with election anxiety

Urban Hippie
Listen, it's been a long 24 hours.  As of early Monday morning, there was no clear winner in the 2020 presidential election. We might get an answer today? Who knows. Will democracy survive? LOL, I mean maybe?  But we do know that New Jersey voted to legalize recreational marijuana, along with a number of other states with weed on the ballots. Then we saw this tweet. Every single dispensary in New Jersey is going to be called, like, Da Wise Guys or Goodfellaz, and it’s gonna be a whole lot of fun. — willy 💧 (@willystaley) November 4, 2020 Our broken, exhausted, internet-poisoned brains latched onto this idea. We needed something else to think about. And if you're feeling overwhelmed, tired, and stressed as hell, I recommend making some dumb Jersey dispensary puns. As a Sopranos loving wor
Perfect impression nails how New Jersey moms will act if weed is legal in the state

Perfect impression nails how New Jersey moms will act if weed is legal in the state

Urban Hippie
Legal weed is on the ballot in New Jersey on Tuesday, which means a powerful force with soon have to reckon with the fallout of recreational marijuana. That powerful force, of course, is Jersey moms.  Mashable's own Vicky Leta created a pitch perfect impression of a certain New Jersey mom — likely Italian-American, needling, a little neurotic, gossipy, loving to a fault, ultimately kind of fun — reacting to and reckoning with weed's legalization. Here, just watch:  I count every line of this monologue as perfect, but here are three of my favorites because I can: "Who ya doing it with? Oooh, Tommy Cacciatore....Hmm, no surprise there." "You lift the box by the foyer, you put your shit in there when's it done — every ash, every paper, all the crap — then you bring it down by the boiler i
Trump says weed is hurting your IQ in leaked audio

Trump says weed is hurting your IQ in leaked audio

Urban Hippie
President Donald Trump is obsessed with IQ — has been for years — and he’s convinced smoking weed knocks you down few points.  Vice published leaked audio from a private donor dinner hosted by Trump in 2018, and a portion of that conversation revealed the commander-in-chief is pretty hesitant about the surging normalcy of legal cannabis.  “It does cause an IQ problem. You lose IQ points,” Trump says in the video. SEE ALSO: Here's how to introduce the boomer in your life to weed The audio was secretly recorded by Lev Parnas, the associate of Rudy Giuliani who has found himself at the center of Trump’s ongoing impeachment saga. Parnas, founder of the hilariously named firm Fraud Guarantee, sparked the marijuana conversation, asking the president if he’d thought about “allowing banking in so